warning, live without warning

This is for the people who go "omg you've stopped blogging". You impatient wanks have now been silenced for another week or so =P

There's three warnings I see that I should care about that I always go "I really don't give a fuck".

1) Batteries

"Do not dispose of in trash"
Now that chemistry has taught me a-plenty, the middles of batteries are acidic, and as the chemical reaction goes to create a current, the outer shell is actually getting eaten away. But they clearly time it so that the outer shell remains intact when your battery runs out of juice. Unless you leave it in the appliance for too long and it leaks and you get shouted at by your parents.
While I understand the environmental dangers of chemical leaching and all that crap - how else do you get rid of batteries?!

2) Cotton buds/Q-tips

"Do not insert into inner ear"
I'm not afraid to admit the only time I ever use cotton buds is to stick it into my inner ear. It's like masturbation minus the stigma.
Plus it cleans out all the wax. So it's like killing two birds with one stone.
There really are not that many applications for a cotton bud. Like it's okay for cleaning small things like lenses, or putting on antiseptic or something, but that's like using a dildo as a door stopper. It's clearly a device for pleasure.

3) Most medication

"May cause drowsiness"
I say "okay" and do whatever I was going to do anyway. Because I don't care.


Since it's been a week I'll attach an extra part. My own warning:
Today I was having fun stomping the brakes in the car when the engine's off - You should try it some time!
Anyways I discovered that although the engine is completely off, the brake lights light up if you depress the brake pedal.

As a future warning to anyone who wants to have sex in the driver's seat when they grow up - rhythmic flashing of your brake lights can only mean one thing. You are not testing the suspension of your car.



@Shelley + Lena + whoever else was on that table and was interested when Annie was talking about the crazy wife who chopped off the dude's penis and I was telling you how the audience+hosts found genital mutilation funny (only if it's on a guy, presumably):