Woo it's heartening to see nobody calls these "memes" anymore. YAY
I used to blog about stupid things that amused me. I need to revive that childish interest in immature jokes.
I average 1 post every 3 days lololol. That's down from 1 a day. Can't tell if I'm using the time for better things LOL
dynamo
http://dynamo.dictionary.com/word-dynamo-challenge
This is a vocab testing game. The crossword is bloody impossible cos the hints are vague - the game I suggest is the "match" gameplay where it actually tests your vocabulary.
I played a couple of the quizzes and found out that Dictionary.com estimates my vocab to be 30,000+ words at the moment. I'll give a more accurate number later if I finish all the quizzes.
But there are so many different ways of considering "types of vocabulary", each as interesting as the other. I've organised in roughly from largest volume to smallest volume.
Recognise as an English word [I can't think of an example of a really weirdly spelt word that I have no idea how to spell, but I could've said "mmhmm heard that as a word before"]
Recognise and can spell [e.g. obsequious is a word I knew and recognised as English, but I really had no idea what it meant]
Recognise and know the meaning if prompted [This is what the Word Dynamo game assesses, >30,000]
Can spell, know the meaning if prompted [Probably slightly less, at 30,000 flat]
Recognise and know the meaning without prompts [Dramatically less - low 20,000's]
Can spell and know the meaning without prompts [20,000 flat]
Use the word in writing such as in essays [Probably something like 15,000]
Use the word in every day speech [Can't be much more than 10,000]
I don't even read over these posts anymore. Year 12 is quite draining =O
This is a vocab testing game. The crossword is bloody impossible cos the hints are vague - the game I suggest is the "match" gameplay where it actually tests your vocabulary.
I played a couple of the quizzes and found out that Dictionary.com estimates my vocab to be 30,000+ words at the moment. I'll give a more accurate number later if I finish all the quizzes.
But there are so many different ways of considering "types of vocabulary", each as interesting as the other. I've organised in roughly from largest volume to smallest volume.
Recognise as an English word [I can't think of an example of a really weirdly spelt word that I have no idea how to spell, but I could've said "mmhmm heard that as a word before"]
Recognise and can spell [e.g. obsequious is a word I knew and recognised as English, but I really had no idea what it meant]
Recognise and know the meaning if prompted [This is what the Word Dynamo game assesses, >30,000]
Can spell, know the meaning if prompted [Probably slightly less, at 30,000 flat]
Recognise and know the meaning without prompts [Dramatically less - low 20,000's]
Can spell and know the meaning without prompts [20,000 flat]
Use the word in writing such as in essays [Probably something like 15,000]
Use the word in every day speech [Can't be much more than 10,000]
I don't even read over these posts anymore. Year 12 is quite draining =O
hate everything
True facts of life
Anyone who knows less than you is ignorant.
Anyone who knows more than you is obsessed or needs something better to do with his/her spare time.
Anyone whose opinion differs to yours has formulated his/her opinions on flawed information. Or is conceited.
Anyone who disagrees with your opinion is a bigot and closeminded.
Seems like this is how people (me included) react to what is otherwise known as "losing". How many times do you walk away from a lost battle and think "That person was such a _____ At least I'm not a ______". Or maybe "That person was so bad at _____."
We are attached to the fact that opinions cannot be wrong. And if we close our minds and refuse facts, we technically can not ever be "wrong" in saying something nuts like "[race/gender/sexuality/etc] people are the bane of human existence". Because if we don't want to look at statistics, we don't have to be wrong.
Don't think I can name anyone who looks objectively at all evidence in any opinionated debate because everyone knows our own opinions are the ones that matter and fuck everyone else.
Woo this took many minutes out of my 4hours of work. I have nfi what I just wrote. Check for grammar and logic pl0x
Anyone who knows less than you is ignorant.
Anyone who knows more than you is obsessed or needs something better to do with his/her spare time.
Anyone whose opinion differs to yours has formulated his/her opinions on flawed information. Or is conceited.
Anyone who disagrees with your opinion is a bigot and closeminded.
Seems like this is how people (me included) react to what is otherwise known as "losing". How many times do you walk away from a lost battle and think "That person was such a _____ At least I'm not a ______". Or maybe "That person was so bad at _____."
We are attached to the fact that opinions cannot be wrong. And if we close our minds and refuse facts, we technically can not ever be "wrong" in saying something nuts like "[race/gender/sexuality/etc] people are the bane of human existence". Because if we don't want to look at statistics, we don't have to be wrong.
Don't think I can name anyone who looks objectively at all evidence in any opinionated debate because everyone knows our own opinions are the ones that matter and fuck everyone else.
Woo this took many minutes out of my 4hours of work. I have nfi what I just wrote. Check for grammar and logic pl0x
i found it hard, it's hard to find
A compilation of small things that are too short to blog about and Twitter is stupid it's just a mass convo site for us.
Cambridge - CAME-bridge (not CAM-bridge)
Pronunciation - pro-NUN-see-ay-shun (exactly how it's spelt, basically). It's not pronounce-iation. So ironic that most can't pronounce the word that means to pronounce.
Penalise - PEE-na-lize (though maybe Americanised to PEN-uh-lize)
Cavalry - exactly how it's spelt. None of that "CAL-vary" crap please. Apparently Calvary is some place outside Jerusalem. Which I am sure you are not talking about. You are obviously talking about the Riders of Rohan =P
I would put "evolution" here but the alternate pronunciation is too mainstream and has been accepted by the dictionaries.
Yay finished. Hope you enjoy.
Oh well, whatever, never mind
I find it amusing when someone who never talks to me comes up to me asking a couple of questions (work related). Then they find out that I haven't fulfilled some sort of criterion of theirs and they say "nvm" and I think "wasn't going to anyway."Clickity
It's bloody hard to click triplets with one hand and click quavers with another. I have not ever done it properly.Like a sir
There are a couple words that I swear less than half the grade knows how to pronounce correctly (I was talking to Max about one of these words I forget):Cambridge - CAME-bridge (not CAM-bridge)
Pronunciation - pro-NUN-see-ay-shun (exactly how it's spelt, basically). It's not pronounce-iation. So ironic that most can't pronounce the word that means to pronounce.
Penalise - PEE-na-lize (though maybe Americanised to PEN-uh-lize)
Cavalry - exactly how it's spelt. None of that "CAL-vary" crap please. Apparently Calvary is some place outside Jerusalem. Which I am sure you are not talking about. You are obviously talking about the Riders of Rohan =P
I would put "evolution" here but the alternate pronunciation is too mainstream and has been accepted by the dictionaries.
Pluralising
I really like the words that have the -um ending to pluralise into -a. Like datum-data, stratum-strata, medium-media. You feel like a boss for knowing that something as stupid as um->a is a form of plural.Setting e.g.
I don't get people (in relative power) who watch over others and get them to ... stay quiet (for argument's sake). Or maybe put away their phones. Then after that they go chat with their chums. Or they pull out a phone and SMS a friend. While the peons can't talk back, and can't talk/use a phone anyway, there's gonna be a great lot of discontent and low morale and general loss of respect. It's so stupid to not set the example.Yay finished. Hope you enjoy.
on jesus
I will clarify my position on Jesus.
Firstly, I really am not qualified to make any judgments (and neither should anyone else feel they are) unless the entire Bible has been read. Merely because picking and choosing relevant verses is known as "confirmation bias". Which is, of course, not objective and a terrible way to approach "evidence".
Now, here are a few dotpoints on my personal beliefs gathered thus far:
This post is pretty long so I'll chuck a break here for reading pleasure.
Firstly, I really am not qualified to make any judgments (and neither should anyone else feel they are) unless the entire Bible has been read. Merely because picking and choosing relevant verses is known as "confirmation bias". Which is, of course, not objective and a terrible way to approach "evidence".
Now, here are a few dotpoints on my personal beliefs gathered thus far:
- I am almost certain Jesus existed. However the reasoning I use pretty much disproves young Earth creationism - we use the BC / AD system. I don't know how much of the world Jesus was rumoured to have travelled, but such widespread adoption of his birth year cannot be purely attributed to hearsay. Like the whole freaking world uses it. In contrast, if young Earth creationism was actually true, why aren't we just in year ~6000? It's not that big a number and it seems illogical to not start from there if it were true.
- While I believe he existed, I don't believe that he was as magical as the legends have him be. Humans have a tendency to glorify greats and to brown-nose awesome people. Jesus, no doubt, would've been a very influential man with great charisma as well as very good ideas. I can't say for sure he never did those awesome things, but I can't bring myself to accept it.
We have a modern version of taking something good and glorifying it and making it seem better - it's called fan fiction. Plus, we humans have the ability to make up crazy shit like Chuck Norris jokes. - To me, proof that Jesus existed does not prove that Jesus did all the things the Bible said he did. That is a fallacy of the worst kind. Just because one fact is true (Jesus is real) doesn't mean that all the other facts are true (virgin mother, water into wine, walking on water, healing blind people, etc).
- Extra note - where are all the awesome magical things like angels and shit today? Why doesn't God just send one down? I think I actually would be converted to Christianity in one fell swoop if an angel came down from Heaven and told me the truth of the Gospel. Until that happens I'm only listening to other humans who really have no claim that they actually know any more than I do.
This post is pretty long so I'll chuck a break here for reading pleasure.
evils of the industry
I was listening to With You on Youtube for the class serenades, right. And then in related vids I saw the video that presumably got Justin Bieber noticed. So I thought "why not".
I don't mind admitting that he actually sounds pretty good for a 12yo boy or however old he was in that video. I was quite surprised.
Then Island Def Jam did something terrible and they produced crap for like a year or two.
Then now Mistletoe is the first acceptable song that I've heard. And by "acceptable" I mean "sounds like every other pop artist now". Which I guess is an upgrade. =D?
I don't mind admitting that he actually sounds pretty good for a 12yo boy or however old he was in that video. I was quite surprised.
Then Island Def Jam did something terrible and they produced crap for like a year or two.
Then now Mistletoe is the first acceptable song that I've heard. And by "acceptable" I mean "sounds like every other pop artist now". Which I guess is an upgrade. =D?
i don't want to forget this
I have three things to write about today
The first is an anecdote
The second is an observation
The third is (are?) some cynical comments arising from Bio
The first is an anecdote
The second is an observation
The third is (are?) some cynical comments arising from Bio
return of surveys
1. Name two things you would NOT tolerate in a relationship.
Pretty sure smoking would turn me off. Then there's crap like respect and trust which is rather hazily defined but I'll put "lack of abovementioned" as the second one :L
2. Which one of your friends do you think would make the best doctor?
Hopefully me LOL
I don't know though - at our school I hardly think there's a standalone person.
3. When was the last time you snuck out?
I never need to sneak out, my parents are chill and let me go if I want to.
4. Have you ever smoked?
Yeah I've tried it and it's pretty disgusting. Mouth feels like shit and how the hell do you stand doing it long enough to get addicted.
5. Do you dream in black and white or color?
Colour - I asked this on Formspring and I didn't find a single person who dreamt in black/white.
6. Have you ever been in love?
Don't think everyone thinks the definition of "love" is the same.
7. Best present to give you?
Some sort of injoke that makes me suddenly remember some day/place. Other than that, something I can use.
8. Have you ever kissed someone of the same sex?
No homo
9. What is your favorite film?
I haven't watched any film more than once.
10. Which family member are you closest to and why?
Guess my brother, because we are similar age =P.
11. Describe your most significant kiss.
I suppose my first kiss... yeah. Don't think any other kiss in that relationship was as "significant".
12. Describe your ex in five words.
Two piercings on each ear.
LOL what else?
13. What, if any, medical issues run in your family?
My dad has slightly high blood pressure, mum has slightly low blood pressure. Fingers crossed it cancels out.
14. Ideal mate?
Friend mate or reproduce mate? Whichever one I choose - whichever one makes me happy and stuff just works.
15. If you got to choose how you’d die, how would you want to go?
Snu-snu.
Of course not snu snu that is rape and nobody should find that funny. &c &c
16. If you had one wish what would it be?
That I would get to save the wish for later. I think that blows up logic.
17. Are you a jealous person?
Depends. Do you have an Aston Martin?
18. What is the current taste in your mouth?
Apples - the core is still in the bowl on my desk.
19. When was the last time you smoked, if ever?
Iono it was a year or two ago.
20. Do you get distracted easily?
Only if I'm trying to do work.
21. What was the last thing to upset you?
Hmm I don't know - I rarely get into upsetting situations :L
22. Do you ever wear ties?
Too often
23. What is the closest yellow object to you?
A post it note marking the answers page of maths textbook
24. If your significant other ever hit you, how would you react?
I don't think a girl has ever hit me with the intention to hurt me. Usually when they hit me I'm laughing because I pulled an incredibly cruel prank.
25. What are you craving right now?
Nothing - my munchie meter doesn't show a reading.
26. Tell one random fact about the last person you kissed.
She was one of the most impractically dressed people today.
27. When was the last time you felt guilty and why?
Usually when I waste too much time on the Internet and I'm like NUUU MY PRECIOUS HOURS OH HOW I REGRET TAKING THEE FOR GRANTED.
28. What is one reason why someone should not fall in love with you?
If I don't love them back? Is that the question's intent.
29. Do you have any addictions?
I bet the internet is actually an addiction but I will probably deny it because that's what addicts do. "It's under control. I can stop whenever I want". BUT I CAN'T, I SAY.
30. Is your most significant relationship over?
I'd be so very sad if that was the most significant relationship I'll ever have. That's a little pitiful :L
31. When are you at your happiest? Saddest?
1) When I'm talking/around my favourite people, 2) When there is noone around and I'm ronery.
32. Tell one interesting story about absolutely anything.
Left of Banjo Paterson's face on the $10 note, is "The Man From Snowy River" in microprint. I can just read it without a magnifying glass (Y)
34. Explain your spiritual beliefs.
Succintly, my beliefs are
-Whether a god exists or not is not relevant to the functions of the Earth and life.
-Prayer or sacrifice can't change anything external (as opposed to internal - within the person themself). It is, however, a good medium for self-reflection, goal setting and positive thinking. Which may have (someone prove or disprove me here) actual benefits. Cum hoc ergo propter hoc, and we think praying is useful.
-The Earth was created 4-5bya by chunks of rock aggregating, not ~6000 years ago because some dude said so.
-Whether you can have a relationship with God is completely personal. Just because you can have one, doesn't mean I can. Just because I can't have one, doesn't mean no-one can. ie truth may not be universal.
-Jesus was quite possibly a real person - however he was just a wise man who was influential. All that walking on water, water into wine, healing lepers crap is fan-fic
-If a God were to exist, it is unlikely that, all at the same time, is not too complex for us to understand/document, gives a shit about us, and made the rest of the universe for the lulz where there's this 0.00000~&c~001% of relevant material, the humans.
35. How did you get your last bruise?
I don't know where my last bruise is. OH MY KNEE FROM PREFECT DANCING. The same maneouvre that ended up getting my pants ripped :L
36. Do you have competition for the person you like?
Depends. If I'm running in the 100m and I'm racing people with no legs, is that "competition"?
LOL JOKES I HAVE NFI WHAT I'M TALKING ABOUT.
37. Where were you yesterday at 7:00 p.m.?
Either about to wank, in the process of wanking, or finished wanking. Why do I even say these things, I mean I was at home doing maths.
38. What are you most self-conscious about?
Whatever people point out. Then I forget and I'm like "what did I need to do again? fuck."
39. Name one career you would never consider and explain why.
In doing this you are making me consider them all. So let's just settle with watch maker, the reason being I cannot give less fucks about watches.
40. Something you want to do before you die
I should make an update post on this, but here is a checklist so far, combining one from April '10 and one from Jan '11.
Capital X is the one's I've done since Jan 11
[X] Shoot a live round
[ ] Paintball
[ ] Get piss drunk
[ ] Go to USA and/or Europe
[ ] Eat a >$100 per head meal
[x] Webcam a stranger
[x] Made a video call
[ ] Wear cologne or perfume
[x] Solve a Rubik's Cube
[X] Been to/hosted a sleepover
[x] Befriended someone halfway across the globe (or any overseas stranger)
[ ] Pick up someone with a pickup line
[X] Smash a guitar
[x] Get a Victorinox multitool
[ ] Donate blood
[ ] Make one of those flyers with rip-off-able phone numbers
[x] Pee into a fire
[ ] Make out in the rain
[ ] Drive a manual
[ ] Grow one of those decorative herb gardens
[ ] Do a real prank call
[ ] Wear boxers
[x] Pared an apple with a knife
[x] Throw an ice cube at a wall and watch it shatter
[x] Earn my own money (ie get a job)
[ ] Read the Bible from beginning to end
[ ] Take breathalyser test
[x] Shave with a manual razor, and then use aftershave
And the inevitable
[ ] Get laid
Pretty sure smoking would turn me off. Then there's crap like respect and trust which is rather hazily defined but I'll put "lack of abovementioned" as the second one :L
2. Which one of your friends do you think would make the best doctor?
Hopefully me LOL
I don't know though - at our school I hardly think there's a standalone person.
3. When was the last time you snuck out?
I never need to sneak out, my parents are chill and let me go if I want to.
4. Have you ever smoked?
Yeah I've tried it and it's pretty disgusting. Mouth feels like shit and how the hell do you stand doing it long enough to get addicted.
5. Do you dream in black and white or color?
Colour - I asked this on Formspring and I didn't find a single person who dreamt in black/white.
6. Have you ever been in love?
Don't think everyone thinks the definition of "love" is the same.
7. Best present to give you?
Some sort of injoke that makes me suddenly remember some day/place. Other than that, something I can use.
8. Have you ever kissed someone of the same sex?
No homo
9. What is your favorite film?
I haven't watched any film more than once.
10. Which family member are you closest to and why?
Guess my brother, because we are similar age =P.
11. Describe your most significant kiss.
I suppose my first kiss... yeah. Don't think any other kiss in that relationship was as "significant".
12. Describe your ex in five words.
Two piercings on each ear.
LOL what else?
13. What, if any, medical issues run in your family?
My dad has slightly high blood pressure, mum has slightly low blood pressure. Fingers crossed it cancels out.
14. Ideal mate?
Friend mate or reproduce mate? Whichever one I choose - whichever one makes me happy and stuff just works.
15. If you got to choose how you’d die, how would you want to go?
Snu-snu.
Of course not snu snu that is rape and nobody should find that funny. &c &c
16. If you had one wish what would it be?
That I would get to save the wish for later. I think that blows up logic.
17. Are you a jealous person?
Depends. Do you have an Aston Martin?
18. What is the current taste in your mouth?
Apples - the core is still in the bowl on my desk.
19. When was the last time you smoked, if ever?
Iono it was a year or two ago.
20. Do you get distracted easily?
Only if I'm trying to do work.
21. What was the last thing to upset you?
Hmm I don't know - I rarely get into upsetting situations :L
22. Do you ever wear ties?
Too often
23. What is the closest yellow object to you?
A post it note marking the answers page of maths textbook
24. If your significant other ever hit you, how would you react?
I don't think a girl has ever hit me with the intention to hurt me. Usually when they hit me I'm laughing because I pulled an incredibly cruel prank.
25. What are you craving right now?
Nothing - my munchie meter doesn't show a reading.
26. Tell one random fact about the last person you kissed.
She was one of the most impractically dressed people today.
27. When was the last time you felt guilty and why?
Usually when I waste too much time on the Internet and I'm like NUUU MY PRECIOUS HOURS OH HOW I REGRET TAKING THEE FOR GRANTED.
28. What is one reason why someone should not fall in love with you?
If I don't love them back? Is that the question's intent.
29. Do you have any addictions?
I bet the internet is actually an addiction but I will probably deny it because that's what addicts do. "It's under control. I can stop whenever I want". BUT I CAN'T, I SAY.
30. Is your most significant relationship over?
I'd be so very sad if that was the most significant relationship I'll ever have. That's a little pitiful :L
31. When are you at your happiest? Saddest?
1) When I'm talking/around my favourite people, 2) When there is noone around and I'm ronery.
32. Tell one interesting story about absolutely anything.
Left of Banjo Paterson's face on the $10 note, is "The Man From Snowy River" in microprint. I can just read it without a magnifying glass (Y)
34. Explain your spiritual beliefs.
Succintly, my beliefs are
-Whether a god exists or not is not relevant to the functions of the Earth and life.
-Prayer or sacrifice can't change anything external (as opposed to internal - within the person themself). It is, however, a good medium for self-reflection, goal setting and positive thinking. Which may have (someone prove or disprove me here) actual benefits. Cum hoc ergo propter hoc, and we think praying is useful.
-The Earth was created 4-5bya by chunks of rock aggregating, not ~6000 years ago because some dude said so.
-Whether you can have a relationship with God is completely personal. Just because you can have one, doesn't mean I can. Just because I can't have one, doesn't mean no-one can. ie truth may not be universal.
-Jesus was quite possibly a real person - however he was just a wise man who was influential. All that walking on water, water into wine, healing lepers crap is fan-fic
-If a God were to exist, it is unlikely that, all at the same time, is not too complex for us to understand/document, gives a shit about us, and made the rest of the universe for the lulz where there's this 0.00000~&c~001% of relevant material, the humans.
35. How did you get your last bruise?
I don't know where my last bruise is. OH MY KNEE FROM PREFECT DANCING. The same maneouvre that ended up getting my pants ripped :L
36. Do you have competition for the person you like?
Depends. If I'm running in the 100m and I'm racing people with no legs, is that "competition"?
LOL JOKES I HAVE NFI WHAT I'M TALKING ABOUT.
37. Where were you yesterday at 7:00 p.m.?
Either about to wank, in the process of wanking, or finished wanking. Why do I even say these things, I mean I was at home doing maths.
38. What are you most self-conscious about?
Whatever people point out. Then I forget and I'm like "what did I need to do again? fuck."
39. Name one career you would never consider and explain why.
In doing this you are making me consider them all. So let's just settle with watch maker, the reason being I cannot give less fucks about watches.
40. Something you want to do before you die
I should make an update post on this, but here is a checklist so far, combining one from April '10 and one from Jan '11.
Capital X is the one's I've done since Jan 11
[X] Shoot a live round
[ ] Paintball
[ ] Get piss drunk
[ ] Go to USA and/or Europe
[ ] Eat a >$100 per head meal
[x] Webcam a stranger
[x] Made a video call
[ ] Wear cologne or perfume
[x] Solve a Rubik's Cube
[X] Been to/hosted a sleepover
[x] Befriended someone halfway across the globe (or any overseas stranger)
[ ] Pick up someone with a pickup line
[X] Smash a guitar
[x] Get a Victorinox multitool
[ ] Donate blood
[ ] Make one of those flyers with rip-off-able phone numbers
[x] Pee into a fire
[ ] Make out in the rain
[ ] Drive a manual
[ ] Grow one of those decorative herb gardens
[ ] Do a real prank call
[ ] Wear boxers
[x] Pared an apple with a knife
[x] Throw an ice cube at a wall and watch it shatter
[x] Earn my own money (ie get a job)
[ ] Read the Bible from beginning to end
[ ] Take breathalyser test
[x] Shave with a manual razor, and then use aftershave
And the inevitable
[ ] Get laid
didn't expect to find this
I was searching my room for my Activity Manual and instead came across this:
Strangely humbling for some reason...
We realise the honour bestowed upon us
in being chosen as Prefects
and we solemnly pledge ourselves
to uphold the dignity and honour
of this office.
We will carry out our duties to the best of our ability
and will foster a spirit of worthwhile endeavour
in every phase of School life.
We will set a standard worthy of our office
and in doing so
bring prestige and honour to our school.
Strangely humbling for some reason...
warning, live without warning
This is for the people who go "omg you've stopped blogging". You impatient wanks have now been silenced for another week or so =P
There's three warnings I see that I should care about that I always go "I really don't give a fuck".
Now that chemistry has taught me a-plenty, the middles of batteries are acidic, and as the chemical reaction goes to create a current, the outer shell is actually getting eaten away. But they clearly time it so that the outer shell remains intact when your battery runs out of juice. Unless you leave it in the appliance for too long and it leaks and you get shouted at by your parents.
While I understand the environmental dangers of chemical leaching and all that crap - how else do you get rid of batteries?!
I'm not afraid to admit the only time I ever use cotton buds is to stick it into my inner ear. It's like masturbation minus the stigma.
Plus it cleans out all the wax. So it's like killing two birds with one stone.
There really are not that many applications for a cotton bud. Like it's okay for cleaning small things like lenses, or putting on antiseptic or something, but that's like using a dildo as a door stopper. It's clearly a device for pleasure.
I say "okay" and do whatever I was going to do anyway. Because I don't care.
Since it's been a week I'll attach an extra part. My own warning:
Today I was having fun stomping the brakes in the car when the engine's off - You should try it some time!
Anyways I discovered that although the engine is completely off, the brake lights light up if you depress the brake pedal.
As a future warning to anyone who wants to have sex in the driver's seat when they grow up - rhythmic flashing of your brake lights can only mean one thing. You are not testing the suspension of your car.
@Shelley + Lena + whoever else was on that table and was interested when Annie was talking about the crazy wife who chopped off the dude's penis and I was telling you how the audience+hosts found genital mutilation funny (only if it's on a guy, presumably):
There's three warnings I see that I should care about that I always go "I really don't give a fuck".
1) Batteries
"Do not dispose of in trash"Now that chemistry has taught me a-plenty, the middles of batteries are acidic, and as the chemical reaction goes to create a current, the outer shell is actually getting eaten away. But they clearly time it so that the outer shell remains intact when your battery runs out of juice. Unless you leave it in the appliance for too long and it leaks and you get shouted at by your parents.
While I understand the environmental dangers of chemical leaching and all that crap - how else do you get rid of batteries?!
2) Cotton buds/Q-tips
"Do not insert into inner ear"I'm not afraid to admit the only time I ever use cotton buds is to stick it into my inner ear. It's like masturbation minus the stigma.
Plus it cleans out all the wax. So it's like killing two birds with one stone.
There really are not that many applications for a cotton bud. Like it's okay for cleaning small things like lenses, or putting on antiseptic or something, but that's like using a dildo as a door stopper. It's clearly a device for pleasure.
3) Most medication
"May cause drowsiness"I say "okay" and do whatever I was going to do anyway. Because I don't care.
Since it's been a week I'll attach an extra part. My own warning:
Today I was having fun stomping the brakes in the car when the engine's off - You should try it some time!
Anyways I discovered that although the engine is completely off, the brake lights light up if you depress the brake pedal.
As a future warning to anyone who wants to have sex in the driver's seat when they grow up - rhythmic flashing of your brake lights can only mean one thing. You are not testing the suspension of your car.
@Shelley + Lena + whoever else was on that table and was interested when Annie was talking about the crazy wife who chopped off the dude's penis and I was telling you how the audience+hosts found genital mutilation funny (only if it's on a guy, presumably):
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