annual 2011

Here are memories from Annual 2011
There is profuse swearing because that is how it happened. So if you are liable to offence then please save yourself while you still have sanity.

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Victor: What's the weather like for the trek?
Brian: I don't know, leave me alone!
Samuel: Hey what are you watching?
Brian: I'm reading a fucking blog post, get the fuck out!
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(Freya blatantly eavesdropping on our convo from the seat behind)
(Pretending we weren't aware of her intrusion)
Jeff: Damn, I hope Freya's not listening to our conversation! She might get offended by what we're saying!
Brian: Yeah, it's pretty rude if she finds out that we FUCKING HATE HER
(I can't remember if Freya chimed out at this point)
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Swearing battles
I have an audio file of our swearing battle (with Johnny just listening awkwardly, at like 11 at night)
But a golden call by Brian
Jeff: Did you just fucking fart?
Brian: No, fuck you!
Jeff: It looks like your mouth makes the same noises as your fucking asshole
Brian: When your shits take a shit, that sounds like what comes out of your fucking mouth.
Jeff: So like, no noise, you fuck?
...
Brian: I fucking wish.
Jeff: Good game, dear gentleman. I concede defeat.
~~~
In barracks phase we met Sammy Lucky - the orphan boy who had no clothes and had to wear Tree's clothes.
I have the audio file on my phone, but I will transcribe it here.
Jeff: Right, tell us the story of the immigrant orphan child.
Tree: What we have here is a boy named Sammy Lucky, who is an immigrant orphan from Vietnam, here to experience the Australian culture of bushwalking.
Jeff: So how did he come about to be... an orphan?
Tree: His parents died in a manufacturing accident when they worked at the braces factory. This is why [Sammy] has braces.
Jeff (To Sammy): So you have free braces for life. What do you think about this?
Samuel Sammy Lucky (idiot accent): Extremely good, man!
Jeff: How do you like your cupcake?
Sammmy Lucky: First time taste the sugar(?) in two year, bro!
Jeff: Do you need vegetables in your life?
Sammy Lucky: No need - what is vegetable?
Jeff: What does your diet consist of?
Sammy Lucky: Meat only. Very good.
Tree: This boy has not tasted fresh water in the last twenty years. He's actually 26. While he may look like he's going through puberty, due to the lack of food in his poor impoverished state, he has not grown.
Jeff: Excellent, thankyou very much for this story of Sammy Lucky.
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Sammy Lucky's first first world problem: I don't think I can finish my hundreds and thousands cupcake - hate life.
(Shit, too much food! Life is the shits)
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ABC Triangle Game. Let's just leave it at that.
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This next conversation - it was between me and Brian. However, I can't remember who said what, so I'll just use 1 and 2
1: I should leave my phone in my sleeping bad so it doesn't fall off my second bunk
2: Next to your penis.
1: Yes, so when I get a text I am happy in two ways
2: Killing two birds with one stone.
1: How bout I kill your two stone with one bird?! *falcon punch*
~~~
The story of the bottle from the pits of hell.
We wrote a complete horror story in Amanda's memory book thing. But the synopsis goes as such.
Brian and Tree were playing with a 2L water bottle. They opened the lid and instead of water *dun dun dun* it was SAND OF PURE EVIL.
Jeff, being a reckless fool, bent down and touched the sand. In an instant, he was gone!
The 2L bottle suddenly gained weight, as if it were filled again. Brian and Tree looked inside the bottle, and JEFF'S EYE WAS STARING BACK.
The sand was not sand. IT WAS DECOMPOSED HUMAN REMAINS OMFG.
Tree carried the bottle for the next few days for some reason or another. And one day it is randomly split open!
Demons started crawling up the cliff faces, searching for a soul to eat.
A sacrificial lamb (unnamed) is ... sacrificed and the demons have settled the debt.
THE unfulfilling END.
~~~
This is a random piece of netting in Brian's tent. We had no idea what it was for. Brian theorised that it was to trap bugs or moisture. I theorised that it was a crucial component in defending against abduction beams from UFO's. I called it an Abductor Reductor.
This was closer to the mark than expected, as installing this required putting the body in such an angle that your abs get quite a workout. Here are a couple of pictures Brian took of me installing the abductor reductor.

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EDIT:
Here's more stuff that should be remembered
Tree: I'm going to buy Apple when I grow up and call it Apple Tree?
Me: So we're putting our last names after companies, are we? I'm gonna buy Microsoft and call it Microsoft Wang *pun master*

Also in Big 2 we must never forget the effectiveness of the Sicilian Opening LOL.
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Now have some pretty pictures =) (in 8mp glory, of course)