ios gaming

There are some people who you would rather not be there when you are having some chill time with your phone.

You may be playing a somewhat chillaxed game of Tilt to Live or Cut the Rope or some shit, or perhaps watching a video on YouTube, or whatever. Generally, it is a time of peace and even if you get frustrated for getting 2 stars for the ninety billionth time in Angry Birds, it's still somehow your quiet time.

This isn't all from personal experience, I've also watched other people utter annoyed exclamations such as "fuck off" to some of these perpetrators.

Allow me to introduce you to the crew.

The one that places their head a bit too close

Do you remember that concept we learnt in primary school called "personal space"? And if a stranger invades your personal space you should tell a teacher or some shit?
Well that was irrelevant because the people watching are rarely strangers. However they are still invading my personal space, and instead of creepy they are annoying.
It is uncomfortably close to have someone's face less than a handspan's length away from my face. I'll count it as "next to my face" if I can see your out of my peripheral vision. If you're behind me I don't give a fuck you're cool and doing the right thing. Unless you're breathing down my neck, then that's a whole different story.
Anyways please don't it is just goddamn uncomfortable and awkward, unless you're of my preferred gender and I like you LOL

The one that places their head in your line of sight

This one takes the previous one one step further and decides that any further than my arm's length away is way too damn far for their eyes. So they have to get in closer. Now that wouldn't be a problem, except I need that particular line joining my eyes to the screen so that I may continue to see what the fuck is going on.
Even if I like you I cannot get over the fact that your head is so much more opaque than it needs to be.

The one who is "better than you"

Invariably you will have come across one of these people before. Often male, they are always "better than you" at the particular game.
They will be more than happy to show you how to "play it properly", or something along those veins, because they are dissatisfied with how you spend your quiet time.
Personally I've watched plenty a person play Fruit Ninja (usually on Zen mode, because it has no bombs), swiping as goddamn fast as their wrist+arms will allow. Despite the badly veiled masturbation movements, I see no need to ruin their happy time.
Obviously that is not the best way to maximise score. But I don't think people realise not everyone cares about score. Some people just want to practise masturbating at school without getting arrested.
Nobody has gone so far as to snatch a device out of my hands (yet), but I can totally see it happening. They will not see my knee flying towards their face until too late, though.

The one that keeps asking what is going on

This one isn't too bad if it's kept to less than 5 questions. However, if I am trying to get away with it in a slow Chem period (read: every Chem period), does it look like I want to answer "what does that power up do?"
Do you think it would be a good idea to run a motherfucking verbal game tutorial when I am trying to get away with not listening in class?
Now let's imagine it's a free period. I wouldn't actually mind answering questions then. It also guarantees that the person next to me is more likely someone I actually like (contrast with who I have to sit next to in certain periods).
And seriously some questions can be answered by just shutting the fuck up, like "which one is you?". Usually it's the one that looks different from all the other ones (Y).

The one that always picks up the phone

You must have experienced this when you were watching YouTube on the phone with a bunch of friends, or when you're trying to solve a puzzle (like Jumbline, 7 Little Words, Logos).
The owner places it on the table benevolently so the group of people can see (usually 5 or so).
Then somebody decides they don't have a good enough view so they go and grab it and hold it up to their own face for a better view.
This would be fine except for one major flaw. This flaw is that the final result is exactly one person with a good view, and exactly the rest of the people who do not have a view at all.
In puzzle games, the person who mindlessly grabs the phone also tends to be the person who does not solve the puzzle. Causation/correlation? Probably.
In my opinion, the only person who has the right to do such a thing is the person who owns the goddamn phone in the first place.


On an unrelated note,
Also Project Semibreve may never come to fruition because I failed to recognise how much time the freaking Trials took up :L
Unless someone really likes logistics and picks up the slack LOL.
Iono if a stroke of inspiration comes up I might finish up the rhythm section but there's heaps of shit to go =(

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